Questions no answers

what does it take to live your life to the fullest... someone tell me .. I've been thinking ,and barely living doing something i have no passion for because it can make me a living is NOT living... I used to think i was one who loved life but i realized it was because life was easy... my parents always put me in the right situation where the decisions i had to make were either good or better... Its crazy i know to regret an almost perfect childhood... Both parents a sister all who loved you... i dont regret the situation or the love i had but the fact i was always living life to gain the approval of someone else.... my family.. freinds .. teachers.... Now that im on my own and the only approval i get is that of my own it doesn't seem worth the hard work and tears... I need to find something im passionate about not what other people think i should be passionate about... I've realised that the only reason i hated writing was because if i tried and no one approved it, that to me was failure... math on the other hand either ou get it or you don't if you don't get it the only thing people can think of you is that you have to try harder next time.... Writing you bare your soul.... but now i no longer care what others think of what i write or what i say... it's a sucess becuase it's truly what's in my heart...probably noone is going to read this but it FEEEELLLLSSSSS good to write this all down... athough im not making sense a lot of the time... SOO early in the morning .. i might read this later and wonder what was i thinking.... yea that's probaly whats going to happen so i'm gunna stop typing now.